power crunch protein energy bar: dark chocolate

I found something new at the Vitamin Shoppe:  Power Crunch Protein Energy Bar.  It's 1.5 ounces and it looks just like a chocolate candy bar, which is why I bought it...

When I broke the bar in half, I thought there were almonds in it; however, I read the wrapper and it turns out they're Proto Whey Crisps.  Basically, crisp rice-like crunchies made out of whey protein isolate.  It made it a little more interesting to eat.

It tastes very close to a dark chocolate candy bar and it's quite big. Sure, it doesn't taste exactly like a real chocolate bar, but it's very close for someone whose had weight loss surgery and really doesn't eat this stuff anymore. And the crispies inside don't really have a taste.  They just lend some texture to the bar.

Here's the nutritional stats:

These were pricey at $2.59 each, but they're worth it for a once-in-awhile treat. This is something I'd tuck into my purse when going to the movies.  I'd rather pay $2.59 and get some protein out of it, than pay $4.00 for a small bag of M&Ms.



my work in progress: dieting

This will be done in a few installments, since it's long.  It's also not completed yet, so hopefully I'll finish that up soon.

Enjoy!

Dieting

Everyone, including myself, thinks there’s some magic diet that will take the weight off fast and it will be gone forever.  I’m going to say this now:  there is no magic pill or solution for weight loss other than cutting calories.  It’s simple math:  calories in, calories out.  If your calories out are more than your calories in, you’re going to lose weight.

I’ve been on a lot of diets throughout my life, although probably not as many as one would think.  I’m always amazed when I see people on TV saying they’ve tried over 30 different diets.  I would guess I’ve been on seven different diets; this doesn’t include all the times I said I was on a diet and just cut calories.  I’ve tried Weight Watchers, Atkins, South Beach, Slim Fast, Medifast, and also worked with dietitian and underwent hypnosis.

I know several people who have tried fad diets, such as the Cabbage Soup Diet, the Grapefruit Diet, and the Cookie Diet, to name a few.  There was also one that involved very deep breathing.  I don’t know what that one is called, but it’s hokey just like all the others.  Oh, and one that involved visualization.  If you wanted junk food, you were supposed to imaging that the food is covered with really disgusting stuff, like dirt and pubic hair.  (Oh my God, I’m ready to dry heave just writing this. I must stop.  Now.) The problem with these diets is that they don’t promote an actual lifestyle change, which is what it takes to sustain weight loss.  They promote fast weight loss.  That’s great, but as soon as you go back to regular eating, the weight creeps back on.  If you limit your calories to what you actually need to sustain the weight loss, then the weight won’t come back.  But after being on a fad diet, you typically eat more than you should because you felt deprived for so long. You might not realize you’re doing it, but you usually are.

Slim Fast is the first diet I tried.  This is probably a very well-known diet to most people.  Basically, you have a Slimfast shake for breakfast, another for lunch, and then a “sensible dinner.”  I didn’t do this for very long, because I was so hungry all the time; it’s very hard to go from eating three huge meals a day, plus snacks, to having a liquid breakfast and lunch.  I wasn’t very good at eating a sensible dinner.  By the time dinner rolled around, I was starving.  I don’t know anyone that had long-term success with this plan.  I tried it a few times, but, ultimately, I just couldn’t do it for long.

I’ve been on Weight Watchers three times.  The first time I lost 80 pounds.  The second time I lost 50 pounds. And the last time I lost about 20 pounds.  It’s a great program:  it encourages healthy eating, exercise, and accountability.  It also gives you lots of tools to succeed, like goal-setting, holiday eating tips, and online support.  When I was on it, they were using the basic Points system.  You get a certain number of Points per day based on your weight.  Every food has a Point value and you can spend those Points any way you like.

The first time I was very focused.  Cindy went on it with me and we attended the weekly meetings together.  That really helped, because it’s always easier to do something when you’re not doing it all by yourself.  We pushed each other and encouraged each other.

I also joined a local gym.  I was very faithful in going to the gym after work.  I went typically four times a week and worked out for about an hour or so.  When I started I met with a trainer who gave me a fitness test; I failed miserably.  Well, it wasn’t pass/fail, but I was in very bad shape.   I had to do one minute on the step, just stepping up and down.  I was breathing so hard after about 20 seconds that I thought I was going to pass out.  Then she measured my body fat and did a few other things with me.

I started my workouts, and I was barely able to make five minutes on the elliptical machine. My legs were burning really bad and I was breathing very heavily.  But I pushed through it and eventually I was able to go for an hour with no problem. I also used the treadmill and the weight machines.

Meetings were on Thursdays.  Eventually I got into the habit of eating a fast food feast after the meeting. That wasn’t bad.  But then I would start eating whatever I wanted on Friday.  Then it got to also be Saturday and Sunday.  Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday I would stay on track.  Then Thursday I would eat very little in hopes that an empty stomach would translate into less weight on the scale. I know, that was stupid.  I also started eating more fast food, which meant a lot of Points were spent on that.

Once I hit the six month mark, I started to lose steam and get bored.  I kept going for a bit, maybe another couple months, and lost about 80 pounds in total, but I finally stopped following the plan altogether and stopped going to the gym. I eventually regained then wait, and then some.

The second time I did Weight Watchers I lost about 50 pounds.  I joined another gym. This time Cindy and I joined the same gym, so we would go together most times. I would say that lasted about six months and then I gave up.  It was much harder the second time around.  I knew all the ways to cheat and had been there, done that. I regained that weight.

The third time was after losing 80 pounds on Medifast.  I joined Weight Watchers again in order to stay accountable and follow a plan. I lost about 20 pounds and I lasted barely three months.  I then quickly regained the whole 100 pounds.

To be continued...

my "me" weekend

This past weekend was all about me.  Mostly.  After visiting the dietitian last week I went shopping to get some items that I need to keep me on track as I try to refocus and lose the last of the weight.  I stocked the freezer, even pulling out the big guns:  the Food Saver.  Bob and I went through the freezer and rearranged it, as it was just a big jumbled mess. We also moved the older stuff to the regular freezer and the newer stuff to the deep freezer.  I found a few things I forgot were in there, so those got defrosted and cooked, and were then put in the Food Saver and frozen for quick meals later on.

So, here's all the stuff I've bought over the last few weeks.  I included my vitamins and calcium.  I actually bought three months' worth, but I only included one month in the picture.  I bought lots of protein bars, some sugar-free syrups for shakes and slushies, shake mix, wheat berries and Bulgar wheat (no idea why I got that, I must have seen a recipe somewhere), and a new lunch box and additional containers.  As you can see, these items are Tiffany-approved.

Bob and I had to go to Bed, Bath and Beyond because the Keurig died.  I ended up buying a steamer insert for my pot.  It was on sale and then I had a 20% off coupon, so I was a happy camper.  I decided to buy the steamer so I can make fish fillets.  I've used the Ziploc steamer bags, but it seems like such a waste...and an expense I don't need.

I did lots of cooking this weekend in preparation for the upcoming weeks.  Lately I've been buying a lot of discounted meat.  I get to the grocery store around 8 am on the weekend, as that's when they mark down meat that has a "Use By" date within the next two to three days.  I started doing this last year when we went through hell, and a lot of expense, evicting our former tenants.  Plus, the price of beef was outrageous.  When going through the freezer this weekend I realized I have a bit too much meat, so I took out some split chicken breasts.  I removed the skin and bones, which I then used to make chicken stock (back of the stove).  I grilled the breast meat with Borsari seasoned salt.  One chicken breast had a homemade seasoned salt I made from sea salt and the Tawa Fry Masala spice blend I bought at the Indian grocery last week.  I also made a big batch of hard boiled eggs; a bunch of sausage, egg and cheese sandwiches for Bob; and cut up a bunch of celery and cheese for snacks. I also made a batch of barbecued chicken legs for my friend.

It was a very productive weekend, and I was spent on Sunday night.  But now I have two organized freezers, a lot vacuum-packed meat, a bunch of food all ready to go for the week and beyond, and I'm focused again.

a visit to the dietitian

A few weeks ago I mentioned that I made an appointment with the dietitian at my surgeon's office, because I got an ass chewing at my two-year post-op checkup (which I totally needed to hear!).  I was supposed to go on February 23, but it snowed and they closed the office early.  I was incredibly disappointed, since I planned to take that Friday off work so I could have a "me" weekend:  stocking the cabinets, fridge and freezer with the foods I should be eating, cooking in bulk, and basically just getting my focus back so I can lose the last of the weight.  Since they rescheduled for March 1, I decided to take this past Friday off instead, which actually worked out better for me.

I was happy to hear they have a new dietitian, as I really wasn't thrilled with the last one they had, so I was excited about the appointment.  The one I had before my surgery just really never had anything to say.  She handed me a pre- and post-op binder and then asked if I had any questions.  Um, yeah. What should I be eating to prepare for surgery?  Do I need to lose weight?  Maintain? Do I need to start supplements yet? And after surgery, she was on maternity leave and then just never came back, so the physician's assistant took over (she's no longer there, since the doc cleaned house).  She was better, but I was never told eat this kind of protein, take this kind of supplement, don't take my calcium within three to four hours of taking anything containing iron, etc.  Really, most of what I learned I learned by reading other blogs and chat forums.  I felt that I really needed some guidance, even though I'm more than two years post-op.

Unfortunately, they double-booked the appointment and were also running behind, so I was about 45 minutes late in getting in to see the dietitian, Nancy.  She was very nice and had lots of questions for me.  I told her about my daily food intake, what I normally eat--good and bad--, what I'm having trouble with (snacking!  crunchy carbs!), the fact that I track input off and on (more off than on...), etc.  She made some suggestions, like cutting a protein bar into pieces and snacking on it throughout the day.  This was new to me, since the physician's assistant always said that we shouldn't eat protein bars, as they're not "real food."  Nancy disagreed and said that many are high in fiber, low in sugar and are made with high quality protein.

This is the good part, and what made it worth the long drive and the wait.  Nancy then asked me how many calories I eat. I told her I try for 900, but feel that's too high.  She gave me a weird look.  She asked, "why 900?" I told her that that's what I had read all over the internet and seemed to be the popular consensus, plus that's what the physician's assistant told me about six months ago.  She said that I should be eating more than that, because I'm tall and have a bigger frame.  She then suggested a new way of tracking my intake that might be a lot easier and fast track the weight loss:  track protein intake, not calories. She said that I should up my protein to 85g-100g a day and get about 30% of my calories from protein.  So, after doing some math, that means I can eat about 1300 calories a day, of which 400 of those will come from protein.  She said that most of the time, concentrating on the (lean) protein intake will cause the calories to take care of themselves. Assuming I don't load up with butter or other fats, of course.

So, even though I had to drive an hour each way and wait 45 minutes to get in, it was totally worth it just to hear that I've been doing it wrong by aiming for too few calories. I never thought I'd hear that!  And that really helped get my head back in the game.  When I was aiming for 900 calories, most days I felt defeated before I even started.  There's just something about seeing that number in writing and then seeing it dwindle to almost nothing after inputting my breakfast, lunch and snacks, and then realizing at 3 pm I have about 300 calories for the rest of the day. That might sound like a lot to some people, but it's really not when you factor in any fats or condiments and the fact that you still have about seven to eight hours before bedtime.  But now I have a new focus:  protein.  I think that will help me lost the rest of the weight, because I have to get "at least X number," rather than "no more than X number."  I'd much rather track protein than calories!

my work in progress: clothes shopping

Another excerpt from my future masterpiece.  This one is about the wonderful world of clothes shopping as an overweight teen/adult.  It really sucked at times.

Enjoy!

Clothes Shopping

Clothes shopping as an overweight girl during the school years wasn’t that bad.  All the way through high school I was still able to wear a Misses size, so I was usually able to buy what I wanted.  Well, assuming my parents could afford it and were willing to buy it.  It sometimes excluded me from the cool clothes, like the nylon parachute pants with the neon zippers (remember those??) and crop tops, but I’m probably better off in the long run for not wearing stuff like that:  there are no pictures with which to black mail me!  (Although, I had Sally Jesse Raphael-like glasses.  They weren’t prescription glasses. Just frames with glass in them.) I did, however, have an issue with finding pants that were long enough—I’m 5’11”—and shoes that were big enough—I was a size 11 in high school.
I once had to go shopping for a formal dress.  I don’t remember if it was for the prom, or if it was for a wedding.  My mom and I went to the local bridal shop.   I happened to be wearing a bulky sweater that day.  We walked in and an older gentleman met us almost immediately.  He looked me up and down and said, without measuring me, that the shop didn’t have anything that would fit me and that their sizes don’t go that high, even if the dress was special ordered.  He hadn’t even measured me yet!  He pulled out his tape measure and measured right in the middle of the store, over my bulky sweater and confirmed that nothing there would fit me.  Talk about humiliating! Luckily, that was the one and only time something that obnoxious happened. If that happened to me now, I would likely tell him off in a voice loud enough for all to hear.

Clothes shopping was always so difficult once I became a teenager.  Starting somewhere around maybe freshman year of high school I began shopping at the plus size clothing stores, which were very limited at that time.  I could sometimes shop in the Women’s department of a department store; however, the sizes typically ran smaller than those in the plus sized stores.  Eventually, though, the department store sizes just weren’t big enough anymore.  I was stuck going to Lane Bryant.  Back then, it was difficult to find plus sized clothing that didn’t look like it was for a 400-pound, 70 year-old woman.  Most of the clothing was fairly plain and baggy, and in drab or loud colors.  There was nothing trendy to speak of.  My choices were looking like I was wearing a springtime bedspread, or a potato sack; the Lane Bryant back then was not the Lane Bryant you see today. And that was tough for a teenager. My mission when shopping for clothes was to find something I hated the least, and that would hide my body as much as possible.  That wasn’t always easy.

As I got older, more plus sized clothing stores opened and there was more of a choice; however, there were often seasons when I found nothing at all that I liked.  It was so depressing to go into a store, go through all the racks one by one, and find nothing I liked.  Not a single thing.  Everything was either clingy, too baggy, had a weird accessory, like an attached necklace or a slit in an awkward place, or it was just plain ugly.

Designers seem to think that fat women like clothing that either looks like something our mother or grandmother would wear, or looks like it is two sizes too small and we should be on street corner.  Sorry, but I don’t want to show off my back fat by wearing something that is fitted and clingy in all the wrong places.  Nor do I want to look like I’m wearing a shapeless, old-fashioned bedspread.  And I don’t want to wear, for lack of a better term, “mom jeans.”  No mom jeans at 20 years old, please. Unfortunately, though, I had to wear them because that’s what fit and was comfortable.

I think the plus size clothing stores are much better nowadays.  It seems like plus size clothing designers finally realize that we want clothing that is comfortable, fits right, and is trendy, or elegant, or just plain put-together looking.  I recently went shopping at The Avenue—I’m still straddling the Misses/Women’s line—and found so many things I actually liked and that looked good on me.  There were some items I didn’t care for, but it was because the material was too thin or the cut just didn’t look good on me.  It wasn’t because they were ugly.  I also went to Catherine’s and found lots of nice things.  I will say one thing, though, plus sized clothing is not cheap.  The average cost of a regular shirt—not a sweater or dressy shirt—seems to be around $50.00.  That probably doesn’t seem like much if you regularly shop in higher end department stores, but that seems like a lot for an average, mid-range store.

There were lots of times when I went to the mall to find some clothing and either one of two things happened:  a store patron asked me for help finding something—they thought I worked there because I looked a lot older, or they asked me if I was pregnant.  It didn’t bother me when someone thought I worked there; I realized I looked much older due to my height.  But it definitely bothered me when someone asked if I was pregnant.  I was devastated the first time someone asked me that.  I was so shocked and hurt that it didn’t even occur to me that I should be angry, or that I should make a rude remark.  I just mumbled that I wasn’t and walked away.  I remember being very upset after that.  It’s such a hurtful thing to say to someone who is overweight, especially at that age. I already felt terrible about myself.  Now I had a stranger confirming what I thought was true:  I was so fat people thought I was pregnant.


As I got older, I was asked more often if I was pregnant, when I was due, etc.  And it was more hurtful every time it happened.  People think that if someone is fat, they must be pregnant. They don’t stop to think that maybe the woman is NOT pregnant, she’s just fat.  I think most of the time people are well-intentioned, though.  They’re looking to make small talk, or they love kids and want to impart some gem of wisdom.  Plus, people seem to go all ooey gooey over babies and when they see what they think is a pregnant woman, they want to be part of that.  They’re not asking if a woman is pregnant because they think she’s fat and they want to embarrass her.  But that’s still no excuse.  I feel it’s very rude to ask a woman if she’s pregnant or infer that she is.  You just don’t know what’s going on in her life.  Maybe she just had a miscarriage and is struggling emotionally, or maybe she’s trying to get pregnant and can’t, or maybe her child just passed away.  Or, of course, she’s just overweight.

my first trip to an ethnic grocery store

Recently I found a fried rice recipe, which I'll post about later this week.  This weekend I went in search of two ingredients I would need:  oyster sauce and sesame oil.  I figured I could probably find them in the grocery store, but they would likely be more expensive; international foods usually are.  I went to several mainstream stores this weekend, as well as a couple discount stores, and although I could find them, it would have cost a total of about $11.00.  Not outrageous, but pricey considering the fact that I wouldn't get much use out of them and might have to throw them away before using them up.

Sunday I made the decision to try an ethnic grocery for the first time ever.  I've never had the need to try one until now, but I had heard that the prices are much better, and I would have a much better chance at finding exactly what I need and at a better quality that a mainstream store, which only carries one or two brands. So, I Googled and I went. 

The first store I tried supposedly carried Chinese, Indian, Japanese, etc.; however, it turned out they carried only Indian products, with a few Hispanic and British products mixed in. There was an interesting selection of foods, most of which I hadn't seen before.  There were some really large fruits with what looked like spikes on them, kind of like a cactus; I have no idea what they were.  What I found most interesting were the snacks.  Indian snacks are much different than American snacks.  There weren't piles of sugary cookies, cakes, candy and pies.  Most snacks were rice- or noodle-based, and were usually savory, rather than sweet.  And the selection of spices was nice.  No tiny little bottles that cost upwards of $5.00.  Most of the spices were in bags, which were quite large compared to what we get at a regular grocery store.  And the cost?  A large bag of whole cloves was $3.99.  Compare that to what you pay at Stop & Shop or Price Chopper. I ended up buying Tawa Fry Marsala spice blend, which was $2.49 for a really large container.  (Not a clue as to what I'll do with it. Ideas??)  I also bought a box of frozen pea-and-potato samosas (love these!) and a bottle of sesame oil.  The oil was double the amount I would have gotten at the regular store and cost only $4.49, which is cheap. But I still needed oyster sauce.  The cashier recommended a Chinese supermarket only two miles away, so I went there. 

The Chinese supermarket was quite large--roughly the same size as a mainstream store.  And the selection of foods was amazing.  I admit, there were a lot of foods that looked downright scary to me, but I'm a white girl whose never visited an ethnic market, so there you go. I also have to admit that I felt highly conspicuous walking through the store.  Although, no one seemed to pay me the slightest bit of attention.  It was my own self-consciousness, really.  Anyway, it took me awhile to find the oyster sauce, since I had no idea it's a form of soy sauce and that's where it would be.  I also decided to get more sesame oil, just in case the Indian version is different from the Chinese version.  Probably not, but you never know. The total for the two items?  $4.58 (versus $11.00 in a regular store)! I felt pretty good when I left.

I probably wasted the difference in gas driving to these places, but at least I discovered new places to go.  And places where I can get lots of spices on the cheap!

Anyone have any recommendations for me as to products to try?  What do you buy at these stores that you can't find in the supermarket?

Here are my goodies.