my work in progress: the decision to have surgery

Back in October I decided to try the National Novel Writing Month challenge, which is to write a full novel during the month of November.  I didn't make my goal, but I got a pretty good start.

I decided I'll share some of it from time to time, as I'm in the process of getting things back in order. I'm seeing the dietitian at the surgeon's office this week, and I think posting these excepts will help remind me of what I'm trying to accomplish. I've gotten so far off track and I'm at the point where I either give up totally and fail, or suck it up and just do it.  I want to do the latter, not the former; the former I've done my whole life when it comes to my weight.

The excerpts I'm going to share are just a first draft.  I know I have some regular readers, so please comment! I'd love to hear what you think.

And here's a kitty picture--my reward to you for visiting and reading.

The Decision to Have Surgery

It took me many years to decide to have weight loss surgery.  When I was in my 20s, my gynecologist asked me if I had ever considered the surgery.  I told her I had thought about it, but I wasn’t yet ready to throw in the towel.  At that point, I felt that having weight loss surgery meant that I was a quitter, and that it was the easy way out—I now know better.  I felt as though I hadn’t tried everything possible to lose the weight.  That was when I began a 15-year roller coaster of losing and regaining the weight.

Several times over that 15-year span I got close to deciding to have weight loss surgery, but I would always come up with a reason as to why I should try just one more time.  The reason was usually that while weight loss surgery would help me lose a lot of weight fast, essentially fixing the physical aspect, it wouldn’t fix the mental aspect.  So, I continued on to lose weight yet again, only to regain all of it and more.

In early 2010, I was at the point where I was ready to have weight loss surgery.  I scheduled a physical with my new primary care doctor and when he mentioned my weight, I asked for a referral to a bariatric surgeon.  He gave me a look of reluctance.  He asked if I had ever tried Medifast.  I said no. He then talked about the program and said that both he and his wife were following it.  He said he has lost about 20 pounds and his wife has lost much more.  He invited me to an informational seminar, which I attended.  The seminar was held at his offices; I didn’t realize at the time that he was a Health Coach for Medifast, which means he got compensation for promoting the program and supporting his clients. I decided to give it a shot and I ordered my first month of food before I left.

The plan consisted of five of the Medifast meals each day, which were mostly mix-and-eat, and then one meal consisting of protein and vegetables. I did well on the program—I lost about 80 pounds—but I got bored within six months, as usual.    I tried several times, half-heartedly, to go back on the program, but I eventually gave up.  I regained all the weight, plus a lot more.

It wasn’t until early 2013, when I was 38, that I finally made the decision to have weight loss surgery. There were two events within close proximity to each other that finally sealed the deal and made me realize that I needed to do something drastic to end the weight loss struggle once and for all.

To be continued....